Kayla Mueller's letter to her family

[Eva Libre]

'Even in prison, one can be free' – Kayla Mueller's letter to her family

The family of the American aid worker who died while being held by Isis has released a letter written by the 26-year-old while in captivity

Family of Isis hostage Kayla Mueller confirms US aid worker has been killed

Kayla Mueller, 26, an American humanitarian worker from Prescott, Arizona, is pictured in this undated handout photo. Photograph: Reuters

The family of Kayla Mueller has confirmed that the 26-year-old aid worker held hostage by Isis since August 2013, has been killed.

Along with a statement in which they confirmed that she had died, the family released a letter from Kayla which her family said was written in the spring of 2014.

Kayla Mueller’s letter. Photograph: Handout/Reuters

Everyone, If you are receiving this letter it means I am still detained but my cell mates (starting from 11/2/2014) have been released.

I have asked them to contact you + send you this letter. It’s hard to know what to say. Please know that I am in a safe location, completely unharmed + healthy (put on weight in fact); I have been treated w/ the utmost respect + kindness.

I wanted to write you all a well thought out letter (but I didn’t know if my cell mates would be leaving in the coming days or the coming months restricting my time but primarily) I could only but write the letter a paragraph at a time, just the thought of you all sends me into a fit of tears.

If you could say I have “suffered” at all throughout this whole experience it is only in knowing how much suffering I have put you all through; I will never ask you to forgive me as I do not deserve forgiveness.

I remember mom always telling me that all in all in the end the only one you really have is God. I have come to a place in experience where, in every sense of the word, I have surrendered myself to our creator b/c literally there was no else … + by God + by your prayers I have felt tenderly cradled in freefall.

I have been shown in darkness, light + have learned that even in prison, one can be free. I am grateful. I have come to see that there is good in every situation, sometimes we just have to look for it.

I pray each each day that if nothing else, you have felt a certain closeness + surrender to God as well + have formed a bond of love + support amongst one another … I miss you all as if it has been a decade of forced separation.

I have had many a long hour to think, to think of all the things I will do w/ Lex, our first family camping trip, the first meeting @ the airport. I have had many hours to think how only in your absence have I finally @ 25 years old come to realize your place in my life.

The gift that is each one of you + the person I could + could not be if you were not a part of my life, my family, my support.

I DO NOT want the negotiations for my release to be your duty, if there is any other option take it, even if it takes more time. This should never have become your burden.

I have asked these women to support you; please seek their advice. If you have not done so already, [REDACTED] can contact [REDACTED] who may have a certain level of experience with these people.

None of us could have known it would be this long but know I am also fighting from my side in the ways I am able + I have a lot of fight left inside of me.

I am not breaking down + I will not give in no matter how long it takes. I wrote a song some months ago that says, “The part of me that pains the most also gets me out of bed, w/out your hope there would be nothing left …”

aka-The thought of your pain is the source of my own, simultaneously the hope of our reunion is the source of my strength.

Please be patient, give your pain to God. I know you would want me to remain strong. That is exactly what I am doing. Do not fear for me, continue to pray as will I + by God’s will we will be together soon.

All my everything, Kayla

[Stephen Quinto]

Sweet and gentle child... how can we ever forget you? it would be amongst our greatest losses. But now you know ...as indeed all will also soon know ...that we have all been the guiding hand that wrote out the destiny that is now upon us. We hope with all our heart that courage and faith held your hand at the end of your special journey in this ultimately sad, God-forsaken place... Listen to our prayer; it has your name written upon it - for you know now ...what we also know. Now you are with those who care, dear one, little sister...

It may take us a while, but Love will guide us and Peace shall be our inheritance ...for we have renounced all but LovingKindness...! 

"When the earth is ravaged and the animals are dying,
a new tribe of people shall come unto the earth from many colors, classes, creeds,
and who by their actions and deeds shall make the earth green again.
They will be known as the warriors of the Rainbow"

[DAMIEN FERNANDES]

GIVE HER FAMILY THE STRENGTH TO KNOW THAT THEIR DEAR DAUGHTER DIED A HERO`S DEATH, AND HER MEMORY WILL LIVE FOREVER.

MAY HER SOUL REST IN PEACE,

GBU.

DAMIEN

[Eva Libre]

You're welcome Des.

[desmond dillon]

thank you for writing it out clearly..